1. Fly to Canada. Possibly jump in a lake.
2. Cook dinner.
3. Go to a bookstore: I choose the book you have to read and you choose what I read - and drink coffee.
4. Go to the beach.
5. Break into a bakery and bake a cake.
6. Climb a tree and order food to be delivered to the tree.
7. Go to a happy hour
8. Help me with my homework (insert other project if you are not as lucky as me to be in school right now).
9. Make a spreadsheet for something pointless.
10. Go ride the ferris wheel in santa monica
11. Pan handle.
12. Make prank calls.
13. Drive to Vegas. Play one hand of blackjack.
14. Go to the Dresden.
15. Go to the Edison.
16. Go to a kareoke bar and sing "Eye of the Tiger"
17. Get a manicure and pedicure.
18. Watch a movie you own that you've never watched
19. Watch a season of F.R.I.E.N.D.S
20. Drink tea for 6 hours without eating anything.
21. Go to Venice beach and take pictures of the freakish people
22. Eat Indian food.
23. Play Wii Tennis/Bowling
24. Go dancing
25. Download free applications onto your iPhone (if neither of you have an iPhone please disregard this suggestion)
26. Play Phase 10.
27. Eat cookie dough.
28. Write poetry
29. Dye our hair.
30. Cut our hair.
31. Repaint your room.
32. Watch Planet Earth.
33. Watch samurai movies.
34. Drink boxed wine.
35. Make pancakes.
36. Hand out Obama pamphlets.
37. Start an online company.
38. Sell all your books on Amazon.
39. Re-watch all the presidential debates.
40. Try to achieve an adrenaline high by getting birds to chase us.
41. Write up a subpoena for an obnoxious neighbor (anonymously).
42. See how many drinks it takes until you vomit.
43. Listen to Christmas music and make cookies.
44. Go grocery shopping.
45. Catch a bad comedy show (I am just assuming it will be bad...we could be pleasantly surprised)
46. Have a long drawn out conversation about our feelings.
47. Buy a CD and sing along while driving up the PCH.
48. Go to Compton.
49. Wash my car.
50. Call our moms.
51. Start a fight club.
52. Eating tour [insert your city] progressive dinner style (a. drinks b. appetizers c. main course d. dessert e. coffee).
53. Buy sponge bob paraphernalia.
54. Go trick-or-treating and see how much candy we can get.
55. Make it a theme night: musical - we must sing everything; British - must talk in an accent.
56. Fly a kite.
57. Go skydiving.
58. Buy new shoes.
59. Drive to Mexico and do tequila shots.
60. Take music lessons. I'll play the mandolin and you play the banjo - we'll become a bluegrass band.
61. Go to the Observatory.
62. Pack and picnic.
63. Be a DD for some drunken friends.
65. Fly to Paris for dinner (this is only if you are paying).
66. Hang out with my roommates.
67. Go listen to live music.
68. Translate parts of the Bible from Hebrew or Greek.
69. Roast marshmallows for smoars over the stove.
70. Look through old yearbooks.
71. Go mini-putting.
72. Make a mixed-tape.
73. Read to children at the hospital.
74. Have a food fight.
75. Make a homemade pizza.
76. Construct an igloo in your living room.
77. Take a night hike.
78. Play 20 Questions.
79. Watch the episode of 90210 I missed.
80. Take a picture of you using every kitchen appliance your grandma never thought you would.
81. Walk a neighbor's dog.
82. Watch the SciFi Channel.
83. Try to run over some cats. (sorry, Erika)
84. Watch old episodes of American Gladiators online.
85. Sample different cheeses.
86. Buy each other gifts at the 99c store.
87. Try our hand at graffiti art.
88. Skateboard with the punk kids outside the Paseo.
89. Make out.
90. Make a video to up on YouTube.
91. Go get ice cream.
92. Test-drive really nice and expensive cars.
93. Pretend we just got engaged and see how many free drinks we can get at bars.
94. Go ride a mechanical bull.
95. Build a fort.
96. Go to a play or musical.
97. Workout at the gym.
98. Just stare and gaze into each other's eyes.
99. Play pictionary.
What are YOUR great date ideas? [realistic or not, you know, whatever]
This is especially awkward if you are interested in the individual hitting on you. There are very few smooth ways to pick up on one person while not letting the other one catch on.
It can be equally as awkward if you try and overcompensate with your date for having just been hit on.
“I think she is one of the most intelligent yet least wise women I know”
Why is this the case? Why do we women do this? We know better - we know what we ought to do and most of the time already know the answer to our questions we are asking. We are beautiful, clever, intelligent women but we are NOT WISE when it comes to relationships and the ooey-gooy feelings with boys. Boys get all up in our heads and make us forget how independent, gifted and confident we are.
I am walking through Target picking up a few toiletry items I was running low on when I heard a young voice coming from behind me.
When I turned around I realized a little boy was chasing me yelling:
Boy: Look daddy, there’s mommy!
Father: Where buddy?
Boy: Right theeeeeere!! [pointing at me]
Father: Oh, no, bud. That’s not her. [father picks son up]
Boy: Yes it is, I KNOW it [Boy faces me and starts yelling again] Mommy, mommy!
Um…actually, kid, your dad was right. I….don’t….really….know what to do. But the good news is that I apparently look like the kind of person that could be someone’s wife and mother. There’s hope after all.
Cause, as Beyonce would say, if you like it you should put a ring on it...
The 20-something from Zhuhai in Guangdong province arrived at hospital having completely lost the hearing in her left ear, said local reports.
The incident prompted a series of articles in the local media warning of the dangers of excessive kissing.
"While kissing is normally very safe, doctors advise people to proceed with caution," wrote the China Daily.
The doctor who treated the girl in hospital was quoted in the paper explaining what had happened.
"The kiss reduced the pressure in the mouth, pulled the eardrum out and caused the breakdown of the ear."
The chorus of warnings was echoed by the Shanghai Daily, which wrote: "A strong kiss may cause an imbalance in the air pressure between two inner ears and lead to a broken ear drum."
The young woman is expected to regain her full hearing within about two months.----------------------------------
I sure hope it was worth it. And I hope you all find someone to make you go deaf this holiday season.
Finding someone to be with is not just about what you have to offer – it is just as much about HOW you put it out there and present what it is you are bringing to the table
Here are some ideas for you [all brought to you by my friend, Mark]:
I am an eligible, non-diseased bachelor.
Loving cougar is not a crime.
Gold digging is an honorable profession.
Anyone else have some good t-shirt’s…or online profile slogans?
“Women are like milk and men are like cheese, we get better with time. An aged cheese is quality and more expensive - no one wants curdled milk. Quality cheese is sought after, curdled milk is discarded, considered rotten and leaves a bad taste in your mouth, it only causes problems.”
Is this why men always tend to go younger, because they don’t like old milk?
This next stereotype is the fact that men have a great sense of direction and women are clueless.
Typically men know how to get somewhere, they have the instinct to figure out how to navigate themselves. I actually know this to be true of a few male friends of mine – one we even call Hydroquest because we can call him from anywhere we are lost and he’ll be able to get us home. And even if they get lost they’ll figure it out all on their own eventually (this is why they refuse to stop and ask for directions).
Then there are women. We have no idea where the heck we are going. If you give us directions somewhere you have to give us overly-explicit explanations which include things like “you’ll see a Target on your left and on your right there is a big bush that looks like Elmo with a mailbox on the corner. If you reach the red bard you’ve gone too far.” And even with this we’ll end up calling you once we pass the red bard by a mile and a half trying to figure out where we are.
I think this is one of the more false stereotypes – because let me just say I have been in the car with some REALLY clueless guys who to this day would not be home if it weren’t for me being in the car with them.
"Don't judge a book by its cover," you say? HOW CAN YOU NOT when it looks THIS good?? Ladies, this is the key to getting men around Christmas. Wear a bonnet, bake a pie.
This publisher needs to be fired.
a side of veggies
free entry to a club
got a fake nail repaired because of my "beautiful face"
free ride at the state fair
a flight to Cabo San Lucas [too bad it was to visit the guy offering it...she declined]
free sweet factory candy
free fries at Ricks
ball of yarn [the guys mother ran a yarn shop]
pair of earrings [he actually took them from his sister]
free ear buds from the apple store
a hand-sketched drawing of Jesus Christ
a pound of beef jerky
What have YOU gotten (or given...)?
And the poll results are in…
30% of you said Yes, difference is good
10% of you said No
53% of you said it depends on what issues you differ
6% said Yes because you do not talk about politics and you would keep it that way
I am not really going to share any political views of my own here; I do not want to get into any debates about whether or not I hate babies, love God or believe in the constitution of marriage. I have been attacked enough already.
But this is an interesting question. Politics can be a touchy subject. I was going out with a guy for a bit just as the election race was heating up. We didn’t really chat much about politics. I even remember him one time saying to me “I don’t know how you are voting, I don’t really want to get into that, but…” Sometimes it is a subject we would just rather stay away from.
If I am honest, I really HATE talking about politics. I was very thankful that in this election I voted the same way as my beloved roommate [because that would have made the last couple of months interesting…she is not what you would call lacking in opinions] because having to have those discussions can be rather draining and emotional and blood-pressure-increasing.
I guess when it comes down to it I voted yes. But maybe the wording of my choices is not great (once again, what is new). I just can’t bring myself to be a two-issue voter which many of my friends admitted to being in this last election. And if someone did not agree with them in either of these two issues, they certainly would not have dated them. I guess I think you need to have a well-rounded perspective, which then leaves room for the grey areas [I realize some people don’t think these areas exist, well, then don’t date me].
Bottom line: Obama is not the antichrist and you should not break-up if your significant other voted for him.
He seemed quite taken by one of the females that graced his cash register. My favorite was his opening line:
Barista: You look EXACTLY like my sister.
Female: Really? No way! That’s awesome. [faaaaar too excited about this probably false comparison]
Barista: Seriously. Well, take your sunglasses off.
Female removed her sunglasses.
Barista: Yep, pretty close. I love your eyes they’re really pretty.
Female: [giggle giggle] Thanks! That’s awesome!
To be honest, I tuned out after that. I am sure it went somewhere like “yeah, I am pretty sure this means you would fit perfectly into my family. We should get married. I love you.” I am not quite sure – but he seemed to be headed in that direction.
And I realize I was wearing sweatpants and a ragged t-shirt, but I REALLY think he should have given me more attention then he did and calling me madam didn’t make me feel any younger or more attractive.
INT. VIVE RESTAURANT - NIGHT
A salsa club is filled with local residents talking loudly and dancing as the Latin music sounds over the speakers fitting in with the local decor and ambiance.
Next to the live band a middle-aged man wearing a vest, a tie with no collar, fake oakley's, a bluetooth and alligator boots dances by himself drawing in a crowd of spectators. Next to him an older couple slowly dances the cha cha as if no one else is around.
YETI sits alone next to the bar drinking a glass of water.
Yeti is attractive, in her 20's, has long brown hair and holds herself with confidence.
HISTORY, a plump, stout Mexican man in his early forties approaches Yeti.
(holding out his left hand)
You, me, right here, right now.
Would you like to dance?
(taking a sip of water)
(in a suave tone)
You are very mysterious. This is good. Mysterious is more attractive.
History then escorts Yeti back to the bar while muttering under his breath "thank you thank you thank you thank you."
And if you still need help or coupons go HERE or HERE.
fall 2006. pasadena. peet's coffee and tea. i'm sitting outside, studying one afternoon...
this older guy, late 30/40s, caucasian, walks by me, and stops next to my table. he looks as if he is about to ask a question. thinking that maybe he wants the extra chair at my table, i look up and smile politely (mistake)... and he asks,
"what nationality are you?"
for those who don't know me: i'm chinese, but i tend to get mistaken for filipino/southeastasian/
he seemed to be a little caught off guard by my answer, but catches himself and says,
"oh.. like, filipino-american?"
then he proceeds to talk to me for a good ten minutes, asking me questions about my ethnicity, showing off his extensive knowledge of asian culture: he likes dim sum! goes to hawaii a lot because of work and is exposed to asian culture! loves sushi! loves asian food!
and then...he asks what i'm studying and then about mft and fuller theological seminary,
"so.. this place does more than just prepare people to be bishops?"
and then...he asks where i'm from and even after i say the bay area, still tries to see if i'm from china mainland or taiwan (like i said, i'm from the bay area).
and then...he asks how old i am and then says,
"i assume you've had many marriage proposals"
and then...he asks if i have a boyfriend (to which i respond YES, a blatant lie) and asks me about the boyfriend
and then...he asks if i've lived overseas and when i said no, he asks surprisingly,
"oh, so you were born here?" (ok seriously. why is it always assumed that i am not born in the US of A?)
and then... he asks if my favorite drink is a cosmopolitan (because... what? all young, hip women drink cosmos? a la sexandthecity? huh?)
and then... he asks where my name, "charissa" originates from (i tell him it's greek), he says,
"its greek? oh, so like greek mythology? and it means greece? like the country?"
"no, not the country, i said grace, "it means grace. g-r-a-c-e.
as he's talking to me the entire time... i never ask a question, never offer a seat... he just keeps asking question after question. finally, he leaves. just ends the convo and leaves. maybe he got the hint when i kept looking down at my book, not fully engaging in this conversation.
a little less than an hour later....
there was a man sitting at the next table over, had work and stuff he was doing... he looked late 30s/ 40s; jewish, maybe. he gets up, as if to go inside the store.. and as he walks by me, he says,
"wow, i was noticing how you flip the pen around your fingers! that is amazing!"
so yes, a habit of mine is that i tend to flip pencils/pens around my fingers. it's...not as cool as this guy is making it sound.
"yeah, i see you studying hard, and able to do that with the pen. i mean, if there was an olympic event for that, you'd win"
oh wow. that...was pretty lame. and with a sympathy laugh, "...thanks."
there is some awkward small talk.. and he starts to walk off. but, i notice that he doesn't walk far, and then he's stopped... as if he is debating something. he comes back over to me, and asks...
"so... what are you studying?
are you kidding me? so i have this conversation again...
he's asking me a lot of questions about school, fuller, and then he says,
"im sorry, this is weird standing over you, do you mind if i sit down... i know you're studying.. so...."
UH. before i could really answer, he pulls out the chair, sits, gets all comfortable, crossing his legs, etc... and just starts to talk.. about mft, psychology, religion. and i'm... just wondering, universe? what is happening to me today? of course, i'm polite in the conversation and after a few minutes... he seems to gets the hint that i don't really want to talk to him, as i keep looking down at my notes/book. finally, he says something about me having to study and he gets up to go back to his own table.
ok. so maybe they weren't actually hitting on me, but seriously people, what is it about me and my i-look-like-im-still-in-high-
Well, when we fall....we fall hard. We [fortunately] don't even have to MEET you to fall hard [take my undying love for Edward Norton as an example]. We are emotional beings - we get wrapped up in it all very easily. Now, I don't say any of this to scare you, I just want to shed some light on why we find it so hard to part from you.
Take these girls for example, I this it is a fair guess to say they have never actually met David Archuleta, [and now they never will if he has any say in it] but their undying love for him was evident and they were CRUSHED when things didn't work out:
Remember when we were that convicted? [I MAY feel a little guilty for voting for David Cook now]
When you really think about it - we girls are just really COMMITTED, loyal, invested, caring, and other really nice words that mean the same thing. When we fall for a guy we really like to put our whole selves into it.
*Thank you Cha for passing this video along
Sometimes it is fun to go out on double dates, bring another couple along to spice things up - but what's REALLY great is when the other couple brings you along because they can't stand being with one another, can't figure out how to end it, and have found fighting to be their favorite pastime.
But seriously, this is a great song. Check out more Joey and Rory HERE.
When we share a problem we just want to be heard. We want to know that there is someone else out there that will UNDERSTAND what we are going through and will empathize with us. When you try and jump in with an explanation of what we could do to try and remedy the situation it makes us think that you don’t really care and just want the conversation to end, you are just trying to come up with a quick fix and you don’t really understand us. Sometimes we don’t need a solution – we just need to talk about it, you know, one of those bitch and gripe sessions.
If there is a problem, fix it. Isn’t that what you are supposed to do? WHY come to me with a problem if you don’t want me to let you know what you could possibly do about it? I am happy to listen to you complain about your brother’s ex-girlfriends mother’s daughter’s brother-in-law but then I am going to give you advice. You eventually have to come to a resolution – you can only TALK about your problems for so long.
Sometimes I think that men and women weren’t meant to ever really get married – they should just live next door to one another and have conjugal visits every now and then. KIDDING (maybe).
I have a soft spot in my heart for these simple, strong, corny and sexy men. Perhaps it is because I grew up in the great Midwest - or perhaps it is just because they are THAT wonderful. Every year as I watch the CMA's or AMA's my country accent comes out and I feel warm and gooey all over. There's something about country music that makes you feel connected, American, and thankful for your life - cause it could ALWAYS get worse. For example:
And now...here is a taste of some of the hotness from last night:
Brooks and Dunn
Tim McGraw (did I mention I am married to him? long story)
Now...I realize that I just put Tim in here twice (and he wasn't even at the awards show) - but he's just THAT great.
Kid Rock (this is for you, Robin)
And I had to throw in Reba McEntire because she is amazing and I have a she-crush on her
Anybody? Any country fans?
So, did I tell you about my date with the Australian boy? We had planned to meet up Thursday evening at this cute little restaurant in uptown at 6:30p. I got a text from him at 5:45p saying he had arrived a bit early and would grab a table for us.
How nice of him, only I was still at work and had not even begun to close up shop because I wasn't planning on leaving until 6:00p. So I frantically try to get my crap together so I can get out the door and not keep Aussie waiting longer than I have to (even though I know it'll take me at least a half hour to get there).
Finally I am on my way scrambling out of the building when I realize I'm the last one to leave, which has never happened to me before at my BRAND NEW JOB. This means I am responsible for setting the security alarm and locking up the building.
Well, with the limited space of storage God gave me in my memory, I cannot remember for the life of me what our security code is to set the alarm. Profanities begin pouring out of my mouth as I sit there frantically reading the instructions by the alarm trying to figure out how to set it, but I still can't remember the code. So I run back downstairs to my office and dig through all of my training packets, papers, brochures, etc. knowing that somewhere in there we talked about how to set the alarm and SURELY I had written something down.
The only instructions I can find are: "Press the button ALL ON, and enter four digit secret code" Balls! That does not help! I try calling my boss several times but I know he's at a campaign event and he won't get any of my phone calls. Plan B.
I decide I will just lock up the building without setting the alarm and just play it off the next day at work: "oh, really? There's an alarm I am supposed to set?"
Meanwhile, it's getting later and later amidst my running around, and Aussie is only looking more and more pathetic sitting alone there at our table. I go outside to lock the door and my key (which I have never had to use before) does not even go into the lock on the door. They freakin' gave me the WRONG KEY!
Now I REALLY don't know what to do! I'm sweating, just cause I'm so stressed and I'm going on this random date with this guy, who has now been waiting for me for like a half an hour (I'm typically not so good at playing hard to get!)
So I end up going back inside, locking the door from the inside, not setting the alarm, and sneaking out the back door...ultimately leaving the entire building open with no security alarm on.
As I head out to my date I leave a voicemail for my boss: "um, hey, its me. I just thought I'd let you know, I just left the office and unfortunately the building is unlocked and the security alarm isn't on...hopefully you'll be able to come and fix that. Sorry!"
Forty-Five minutes after the initial text I'm horribly parallel-parked about ten blocks from the restaurant but all nerves about a first date are gone, I am simply trying to think of how I can explain my tardiness without sounding like I just made up a really bad excuse to get out of a first date. Feel free to borrow if you like: "Turns out I'm still the new girl at work."
GREAT way to start a new job and a first date. Amazing.
"It’s better than a bud lite lime, but not better than a Miller lite" [when referring to a REALLY GOOD lager] - Hydro
"It doesn't matter where you get your appetite as long as you come home for dinner." [When referring to marriage] - Friend's mom
"It's like I was the loading dock and she was the tractor trailer" - Male
"Man, I wish I would have known. I would have paid more attention to you" [referring to a girl liking him in High School] - Male
"I hope one of them falls off the stage on top of me when we go...and I hope they choreograph something for them in Speedos" [talking about Twitch and Will on So You Think You Can Dance] - Yeti
"You should have seen how I was before I met my husband boy crazy slash just crazy." - Female
"I may be a big guy but praise God I don't have cankles." - Male
“All I’ve got going for me at the moment is a date with Latin lover and cross-blogging” - Yeti
"I caught [insert hot guys name] starring at me, but I think he just stares." - Female
"To be honest, I have no idea what his face looks like" [when referring to how much she liked his biceps] - Female
Erika: If I have children someday that’s probably how they’ll dance [when watching a young boy break dance on television]
Yeti: Are you going to train them?
Erika: Nope, I’ll just pray.
"Oh, speaking of classy, I now have a crush on a guy with a girlfriend" – Jennifer
Yeti: Oh gosh, that shirt is disgusting and should not be allowed. But I am sure he has a good heart [referring to a man wearing a plunging v-neck]
Emily: Yes, you can almost see it!
Boss: I am going to look for a boyfriend for you.
Yeti: Really? Wow. You are usually so protective.
Boss: Yes, well. I just don't want you to end up alone with lots of cats.
I have to be honest though, sometimes I get this prideful grin on my face when I am out with them because I know the looks I am getting – I know that girls are envious because they wish they were in the presence of such greatness. But then when I really stop to think about it…I don’t think I should be so prideful. These guys are actually really hurting my game. They are acting as one giant cock block.
It would be easy for anyone observing us to assume that I am with one of them, and that would be a logical assumption to make. And what guy in their right mind is going to come up and talk to me or ask for my number when I am surrounded by these fine men? You’ve got to be all sorts of bold I’ve never seen before. I think I need to stop hanging out with them so much – besides, I am “one of the guys” so some of the conversations I’m overhearing I could go my whole life without knowing ☺
“Boundaries don’t keep other people out, they fence you in. So you can waste your life drawing lines, or you can live your life crossing them…and if you’re willing to take the chance, the view from the other side is spectacular.” – Meredith, Grey’s Anatomy.I like this quote. As I crawl higher and higher in years I become more defined in my passions, desires and goals. But this quote got me thinking. When we are considering what we want to do with our life, a potential person to share these things with becomes something I have started to think about more.
Where do we draw the line or how much of a chance do we give someone to embrace what we are passionate about? Should we close the door because we don’t feel like someone wants to do the same thing with his or her life that we do? Or perhaps we should go for someone we feel connected to and hope that God will draw our paths together?
I can’t help but feel we tend to box ourselves in too much at times. If my life had turned out like I very much thought it would when I was in high school, let’s just say none of you would know who Carrie Underwood is but you ALL would have heard of my name and number one hits on country radio.
Life changes, paths change, desires change – and I think true connection comes down to chemistry and a foundation of values that are common when it comes to family and faith. The rest you can figure out together.
1. You have to see this person EVERY DAY, if it does not work out - awkward.
2. You get to see this person EVERY DAY, if it works out - awesome.
I guess if you are interested in someone at work it can be miserable being around them all the time without at least giving it a shot...but beware the repercussions.
I don't know, it worked for Jim and Pam [who aren't real] but I think they're the exception.
**P.S..did you see I moved to a dot com? Make sure you update your bookmarks and post feeds!
They say life's a bitch and then you die, and they may not be all wrong on that point.
But in between the bitch and the death there's a whole lot of living going on. And not all of the stuff that makes living worthwhile is headline-worthy.
I used to build my life around all the And Then's:
go to school And Then summer break. graduate And Then college. graduate again And Then find a job. write a poem And Then get published. meet a boy And Then go steady. recover from breakup And Then find new boy. read great book And Then buy the sequel. go on vacation And Then plan the next trip.
You get the gist.
Always something new, something more, something better just around the corner, And Then the next corner, And Then the one just past that.
Perhaps it's age or a small measure of experience or some bit of unwarranted wisdom, but somewhere along the way from one corner to the other, I've discovered that the really good bits of living, the moments that keep you afloat when the floods come, are the ones that come just before and between the And Then's.
Not just looking forward to reading a good book, but really enjoying the one you're reading right now. Not just getting published, but actually writing, the minute decisions you make as you set the words down on the page, cross them out, and starting again. Not just going on vacation, but all the small delicious bits of planning that come before -- buying the guidebook, exploring a map, learning new Italian phrases.
Life happens in the moments in between. In the waiting. In the details. In the insignificant moments. During breakfast. At bedtime. Or when you open your eyes two minutes before your alarm goes off.
And Then isn't the point. It's a distraction. When you're always peering around the corner, looking through the next doorway, you're too impatient to appreciate the small things unfolding all around you.
So that's my platitude for today. Maybe I'll think about it a bit longer And Then I can write about it a bit more eloquently.
-Lo, who has no idea what's coming next.
Do NOT say you can’t live without sex…it makes us think you aren’t serious about a relationship or are going to jump us on the first date.
If there is a question regarding what is most important to you/what you can’t live without, don’t say “friends, family, God” blah blah blah, those are kind of givens – all you are telling us is that you are the same as every other guy we’ve been matched with. What makes you stand out? Be unique. What do your friends mock you relentlessly for because you can’t live without it?
We want something that shows your personality – what makes you distinctive – why would we choose you out of the THOUSANDS of men eHarmony things we are compatible with on 29 dimensions? Like, what you’re most passionate about, how you spend your leisure time or “additional information” are great areas you can let your personality show.
We do actually care about grammar. Take the time to read through your profile and make sure everything is spelled correctly. And please do not write stream of thought.
Make sure you fill out enough sections. While the strong silent type is a draw for many of us – you’ve got to give us SOMETHING to go off of. If you only have three answers filled out, we’re not likely to bite the bait (unless you have a REEEEEEEALLY pretty face).
Bottom line: it is hard to meet people online. You’ve only got a small space to show a bit about yourself. You don’t have to be so serious right away, make it fun and show your personality.
…or just email it to me and I’ll proof it for you – that might just be easier ☺
**P.S..did you see I moved to a dot com? Make sure you update your bookmarks and post feeds!
I am really hopeful this could be a pairing for next season's "Dancing with the Stars"
**P.S..did you see I moved to a dot com? Make sure you update your bookmarks and post feeds!
I've found a couple interesting articles lately:
#1: New research shows how marriage affects your health in the long run
(July 4, 2006) -- Married folks have longer, healthier lives than singles, research finds--and a new British report sheds light on why. Men cut down on fat, salt, and sugar when they move in with a partner.
Getting hitched is good for women, too--eventually. "At first, women eat more unhealthy foods and put on weight," says lead researcher Amelia Lake, RD, of the University of Newcastle upon Tyne's Human Nutrition Research Centre, who reviewed 15 studies on couples. Women gain 3 pounds on average within 3 months of saying "I do"--and 19 pounds by their 10th anniversary.
But as the years go by, couples tend to adopt each other's better habits. A University of Pittsburgh study of 3,075 men and women ages 70 to 79 finds that married couples are more active than solos, and highly active men are three times more likely to have a vigorous wife.
Give your honey a big kiss. New research shows that love guards against heart disease, women's number one killer.
The catch: Only women in happy twosomes get this better-than-a-pill protection, says San Diego State University psychologist Linda C. Gallo, PhD, who tracked the health and happiness of 493 women for 13 years. Using blood tests, Gallo found that women with the luck, skill, or emotional fortitude to have created highly satisfying marriages were simply in better health.
They exercised more, smoked less, and felt less frazzled. As a result, their cholesterol, blood pressure, blood sugar, and body weight--the big heart attack risk factors--were lower. They also felt less depressed, anxious, and stressed.
Top happy-marriage factors: time together, communication, good sex, and financial compatibility, plus shared lifestyle, personality type, and interests.
"It's clearly worth nurturing your marriage--in ways that make you feel happy--for the sake of your own health," Gallo says.
As wiser men than I have observed, it's never possible to truly know the nature of another person's marriage--but as a cardiologist, that doesn't stop me from trying. Don't get me wrong. I'm not interested in gathering titillating details or conducting a field study on the laws of attraction. My radar is sensitive to the status of my patients' relationships for one reason: Marriage affects your risk of having a heart attack.
For many of us, that influence is positive. We now have a lot of evidence that intimate relationships (and to a lesser degree, friendships) buffer you against heart disease. On the whole, long-term statistics show that married people live longer than singles, suggesting that it's always better to tie the knot than to go it alone.
But is it? Some recent research showed that the marital effect is more complicated than that. (When it comes to marriage, is anything uncomplicated?) A recent study in the Annals of Behavioral Medicine found that a troubled relationship is worse for you than remaining single. Spouses who reported a lot of negative encounters with their partner had blood pressure that was on average 5 points higher than that of single people. The emotional stress of a difficult marriage typically causes adrenaline levels in the blood to spike, raising blood pressure; it can also cause blood vessels to spasm. Worse, women who keep their feelings to themselves during arguments with their husband have a four times greater risk of dying than women who do not, according to findings reported in the journal Psychosomatic Medicine.
So obviously, the quality of your marriage is a key factor in determining whether your heart will benefit from it.
In my practice, I can get a pretty good idea about how a couple is getting along if they come in together. Sometimes a little squabbling is a good sign. Typically, the wife has urged her husband, who'd rather be at work or playing golf, to make an appointment. I'll ask him if he's eating right, exercising, no longer smoking. He'll say yes, while behind him, his wife will be shaking her head no. Although they appear to be in conflict, I don't worry about them: They obviously care about each other or they wouldn't be here.
Other patients simply confide in me, or my staff, that their marriage is going poorly. I advise them to spend more time exercising, which is the best anxiety reducer I know. But the most important thing I tell them is that they should seek more social support--concentrate on seeing more of their friends and kids so they acquire the heart-protective benefits of good relationships outside their marriage.
The lesson for you? When you bolster your marriage, you invest in your heart health. And if your relationship hits an extended rough patch, tell your doctors. They may not be much good at marriage counseling, but they will help prevent your heart from breaking, literally, even more.
Arthur Agatston, MD, a preventive cardiologist and an associate professor of medicine at the University of Miami Miller School of Medicine, conducted several groundbreaking studies on heart disease and is the author of The South Beach Diet Supercharged: Faster Weight Loss and Better Health for Life. He maintains a cardiology practice and research foundation in Miami Beach, FL.
So, basically, being single can be detrimental to your health. Maybe the NCMO doesn't sound like such a bad idea now...
Guess I need some help from someone who knows a bit more about technology :) Sorry for the hiccup (and the ones yet to come) - we'll be back on track here soon enough.
Pronunciation: \ nic-mo\ or \ non committal make out\
Etymology: English slang, deriving from Christian youth subculture.
Date: Late 1990s
1. The act of engaging in kissing or make out type actions with no expectation or hope for a future relationship.
At one time or another we have all entertained the thought of the NCMO. Some of us joke more candidly about the idea, and still there are even a select few that have utilized the NCMO. Nevertheless, there are still many questions surrounding the event. Is a NCMO truly possible?
Sure, we all have our animalistic urges for physical affection. We often pawn off the idea, but everyone needs a good hug to keep his or her sanity. When the well runs dry, to what lengths are we allowed to seek other means of quenching our thirst?
On paper the NCMO works perfectly for this occasion. However, what are the true expectations of the involved parties? Common sense will tell you that at least one of the parties [if not both] anticipates more than a one-time rendezvous. With false expectations curtailing from at least one member, awkward encounters are the least of concerns.
What about those individuals who base an entire relationship off the NCMO? They continue to engage in the non-committal make out, time and time again. The investment of feelings and emotions are bound to enter the equation at some point.
You can’t have your cake and eat it too.
There are two sides of the coin any way you flip it. Regardless of the intentions, the consequences seem to be cloudier than a smog heavy day in Los Angeles.
What are your thoughts on the NCMO?
“Why don’t YOU?” (said with a sassy attitude)
“Cause I’m in love with you.”
“I do…how did you not know that?”
“I’m dating Jesus.”
“I’m pretty sure eHarmony will find me one any day now.”
“Cause boys smell.”
“My dad shot the last one.”
“Haven’t found anyone that’s been able to handle me yet.”
…so, why don’t some of YOU have a boyfriend or girlfriend?
No one wants to be there anymore:
He wants you gone.
You want to leave.
...why didn't you just drive?
*note: this scenario did not actually happen to me, don't be afraid to comment.
As he passed Erika he looked at her and said, “you look REALLY beautiful tonight”
[The following takes place in a matter of three minutes]
Erika: You look really familiar, do I know you?
V: What? (removing headphones from ears) Yeah, you totally look familiar to me too. (lie. Good one, but a lie).
Erika: Where are you from?
V: I’m Indian, I’m from fuckin’ India.
Erika: Noooo, (giggle) I mean do you live in Pasadena?
V: For like a thousand years probably [British accent is fading in and out]
V: We should go get a cocktail right now.
Erika: Oh, I don’t know about that. We are just headed home. [Erika points at Yeti who kind of can’t believe this whole interaction is taking place]
V: Ohhhhh, riiiiiight, you’ve gotta work. I’ve gotta fuckin’ work in the morning too.
Erika: Where do you work?
V: Right there at city hall. [points behind him to where the Pasadena City Hall….kind of…is]
Erika: what do you do?
V: I’m an architect. [I am now worried about the structural integrity of our new City Hall]
Erika: That’s really cool.
V: (Turns to Yeti) What do you do?
Yeti: I work for….(cut off)
V: Come one let’s just grab a fuckin’ cocktail.
Yeti: How bout you give us your number and we’ll call you some other time to grab a drink [SEE readers, I am learning to GET the number NOT give it!]
V: You won’t fuckin’ call.
Yeti: But what if we do?
V: You all say that.
Yeti: Well, just try us and give us the number.
Erika: well, since you are so adamant we won’t call, we probably will.
V: (turns his head to the sky, as if looking to the Lord) Oh, so that's how it works?
Erika: Are you sure you need a cocktail tonight? Where did you just come from?
V: I was in Hollywood one day last week.
[Erika and Yeti…exchanging confused look….]
[V Starts going through his wallet (we assume trying to look for a business card) but then pulls out his license and shows it to us.]
V: Look, this is me, I’m serious, I’m a good guy.
Yeti: Yeah, you have a nice smile.
V: Yeah, it’s a great smile.
Yeti: Look, you’re an organ donor – you’re for sure a nice guy.
V: Yeah, why would I fuckin’ keep these things when I’m gone. In fact (giggle, giggle) I feel pretty bad (giggle, giggle) for whoever gets my liver when I kick it (giggle, giggle).
[Erika and Yeti courteous/nervous laughter]
V: (looking toward Erika) Seriously, you are beautiful, where are you from?
V: No, but like, Mexico or something?
Erika: My parents are.
V: (Turns to Yeti) You’re pretty too, where are you from?
Yeti: Umm, Illinois.
V: Ah yeah, Chicago and shit.
V: I am moving to Chicago in a year for grad school intenational relationations U of Chi. [imitates as if smoking weed].
Yeti: So you plan to study a lot?
V: Well, yeah, and blues and jazz and shit.
Yeti: See, if you give us your number now – we could call you then as well when we are back in Chicago for Christmas.
V: I don’t have any business cards.
Yeti: You could just give it to us and we could put it in our phone.
V: Um, Ok 530…that’s the area code, I used to live in San Francisco…530
Erika: You lived in San Franscico? I love it there
V: Yeah, dude, that is a fuckin’ great city!
Yeti: (turning toward Erika) Please don’t distract him – he needs to just get this out.
Erika: Oh, yeah (giggle) sorry.
V: 530…. [moments that feel like hours later we have the number]
Yeti: OK, we will give you a call sometime.
V: Really? Cause, actually, you probably shouldn't. You don’t want to know me (giggle, giggle).
Erika: giggle giggle giggle…k, walk safe!
Yeti and Erika: OK, we are SO going to call that guy!!
When watching 90210 Tuesday night [I know, I know, I judge me too!] the hot English teacher was on a site called "I'd Date Me". I immediately became curious as to whether this site actually existed or not so my roommates and I did a websearch. It does not...but we were delighted in what we DID find...
I'd Date me =D Just Read!!
I went to a show about 2 days ago. @ Bowery. It was cool but it sucked cause everybody there had a chick to rock out with. I was like damn, I really miss those days.
I just want a girl that;
-Likes dinner and a movie -Doesnt mind my dorkiness at times
-Likes to laugh
-Go to shows and concert
-Listens to good music with (Dance Gavin Dance and The Used) and get all close
-Isnt high maintence
-Who I can text random things too like "Will you date me" and "I love you"
-Wears my sweaters
-Love to shop @ hm, urban, and Journeys
-I can hang with @ St. Marks Place
-And eat with @ BAM, Dumpling Factory, or Chipolte Mexican.
You could really learn to fall in love with me cause im that type. Really funny,cute and snuggly, chill, and laidback. I write poetry and skateboard so thats a plus. Im kinda femme tomboy. Skinny pants and dirty vans. Im no weirdo just heard other people did this so i'll give it a shot. Hey who knows!
Send me a pic and i'll send mine, we'll talk and yeah..
Ok see ya!
That's right - you can post about yourself on Craigslist...then just wait for the dates to start rolling in. And if you are in New York, please email this guy - and then send me the story. He just sounds like a good time.
[I also get a kick out of the "missed connection" section. But, please, beware of some of the other sections Craigslist has allowed...not so good]
I decided we needed to break it up into categories so here is the first of I have no idea how many.
#1 The Photo
The photo, let’s admit it, is probably the most important part of your profile. This is where the first impression comes in. If the initial “I think I could be attracted to this person” is not there – most people won’t take a whole lot of time reading the rest of what you have to say. So here are some helpful hints (and samples)…most what NOT to do.
Do NOT put up pictures of you with other women unless it is labeled “me and my mom” [and even then…I am not quite sure I am ready to meet your mom yet]. And while we are at it, photos where you have clearly cropped out a woman smashing herself very close against you or simply blurred out her face are not noble attempts to avoid this...and neither are you with WAX figurines. Just TAKE A NEW PHOTO if you don’t have any without girls in them.
Do NOT take a photo of you half naked in the mirror with your cell phone.
Do NOT take three different photos of you that are exactly the same just three different angles with slightly different faces. This does not help me.
Do NOT take a photo with your stuffed animal. I know you are trying to convey you are funny, but it comes of kind of weird.
Do NOT put up group shots unless it is close enough so we can see your face and you clearly label yourself. I don’t know you well enough yet to pick you out of a crowd. Make sure it is full-size…the tinny-tiny photos are not really worth it.
Do NOT put up pictures that are not you. It is REAL funny when you put up pictures of celebrities. If only I had actually been matched with them.
OK, that is as picky as I can think to be at the moment. Anyone else have helpful hints to add?