The negatives

I was once talking to my father about how my evangelical upbringing ruined dating for me. I feel guilty and manipulative if I date someone I am not certain I want to marry someday. But the only reason I am uncertain is because of all the negatives I pick at. Why do the negatives always stand out so much more than the positives?

My father proceeded to tell me to take a blank sheet of paper and make a list of all of the weaknesses the boy had. Then on the other side of the paper I was to make a list of all the weaknesses I would RATHER him have.

This was actually quite a helpful exercise. Because there are no other weakness you would rather them have – and no one is going to be perfect. Maybe I have it pretty good if the only weakness is telling dumb jokes and liking different music than I do (OF COURSE there are more…but I am not going to share those with YOU).

And don’t try and make a list about yourself – because you’ll just get overwhelmed with where you fall short and add “crazy” to your significant other’s list because you can’t understand why they decided to date you!


Time and Money

have i ever told you all how much i hate dating? seriously. i often dream about just waking up married one day. dating is torture. it is awkward, takes a lot of time and is often stressful (maybe i have not been dating the most amazing men ever....)

anyway, a friend of mine sent me this article that says the average woman dates 24 men before she finds the right one...and also spends around $3000!! this article stresses me out because i am pretty sure i am on number 3 or something so i have forever to go....

In the study, 7 percent of women surveyed went on 41 to 60 dates before finding someone to share their life with.
And 1 percent of women said they had been on 61 to 80 dates before finding someone suitable.
The research also revealed that despite the amount spent on each date, a third of women have left halfway through after realizing they had met "Mr. Wrong."
One in four women will meet a man just once before deciding whether or not he is "the one," according to the research.
Thirty-five percent will give a man two dates, and 16 percent make their decision after three dates.
check out the full article HERE.


Reader Question

Here is the reader question of the day:

What happens when you go out with a guy (or girl) who is really great, but a terrible kisser... do you decide to try to teach him how to be a good kisser or do you just not go out with him again??