8.29.2008

Another car ad

In keeping with the theme of "smart is the new sexy" a car commercial came out for Mercedes Benz [I am so glad car commercials are getting more interesting] with the theme "beauty is nothing without brains" - I like the way advertising is heading....


video

8.28.2008

Giving a gift

So, I gave a boy trail mix. That’s right…I paid attention to something he said (mainly that he liked to eat trail mix) so I went to the store and bought some, and then I picked up a card with it. I had to make sure it was pretty vague, nothing that said “I want to have your babies” on it, and then I dropped the little gift off at his apartment.

I am not going to say the response was horrible [it was] I am only going to say it was not great. “Thanks for the card” was his reply over g-chat the next day. Really? OK…apparently someone buying you TRAIL MIX is not a big deal. But, let me tell you…it IS a big deal.

I have come a long way since my high school and college days. There was a boy I was head over heels for in college (let’s call him Lava) and I just didn’t know how to act around him. I was pretty sure he was into me but he was just so PAINFULLY shy. You see, I am what they like to call stubborn. I only want to have to push so hard because then I actually feel like I am making some guy like me, and that just feels pathetic. So one day [again, after paying really good attention] I went out and bought Lava some Swedish fish. They’re one of his favorite little candies to munch on. But when it came time to give them to him, I chickened out. I had spend quite a bit of time the evening before making the cheesiest card you will EVER see [something to do with water and a goldfish and “of all the fish in the sea you’re the only one for me…gaaaaah!!!] Anyway, when I went to put the fish and card in his PO box I just didn’t sign my name – I left it anonymously. Now, how is THAT supposed to achieve what I wanted it to? And to make matters worse he got it right before the class we had together. So, throughout the entire class he was making comments about how thoughtful it was someone had left those for him, he couldn't figure out who it was, etc. And I was eating Swedish fish I had bought pretending I had no idea where they had come from. Real smoooooth.

But apparently even signing your name on the card doesn’t really help matters any more then anonymously giving it. THIS guy didn’t even share any of the trail mix. OK, baby steps though, I guess it is not realistic for a guy to know that trail mix is hinting at happily ever after.

Damn all those crafty girls that do this so frequently it makes us other girls look typical.

8.27.2008

Top 5 Famous Freebie List

We all have those celebrity crushes...you know, those ones that if we ran into them, we would for SURE go for it [cause would be really smooth and know all the right things to say and OBVIOUSLY they would be instantly attracted to us].
I think usually married and/or dating couples come up with these list, you know, the "freebie" list - the "good-luck-you-could-never-get-them-if-you-tried-but-I-won't-get-mad-if-by-some-miracle-you-do" list.

Dooce did her top 5 list [it was not good], and I had been thinking for some time this could be interesting [offensive] to do, so let's give it a try. Here is mine:

**OK...I redid my list again - the unfortunate two I have had to bump off my list have been shadowed.

1. Edward Norton
2. Wentworth Miller
2. Batman [Christian Bale is OK too]
3. Jack Black
4. Daniel Day-Lewis
4. Will Smith
5. Tim McGraw

Now, as much as I appreciate Ana C and her comment below - this is not the point of the exercise. So...please make up alias names [like Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise, Bruce Willis] for your husband if you really can't come up with celebrities...










Dooce got 801 comments on the first day she posted this, I am assuming I will get at LEAST half of that...your list?

8.26.2008

Welcome to the World Haven!

Words escape me when it comes to expressing how excited I am that this little girl has now entered the world. Karla and Aaron are two of the most amazing people you will ever meet. I can't wait to continue walking through life with them as they now raise and nurture a lovely daughter [and now Olivia and I can fight over who will be the favorite aunt!]























Haven Elizabeth was born August 19, 6 weeks early: 4 lbs. 13 oz. and 18 inches long. She has spent the first week of her life in the NICU, but is doing well and getting stronger everyday - we're hopeful she will come home within the next week or so.






























Welcome to the world Haven...we love you!

8.25.2008

You're single as...well, single

Like I said…guys pick-up lines are just getting better and better. Here’s another example that happened to a friend of mine [did you all read that? This did NOT happen to me, so although it is told in first person – cause my friend sent it to me – it is not my story…OK…let’s get to it]:

-----------------------------------
I went to a good friends wedding and was having a great time. Across the room I saw Wedding Crasher, I knew him from church growing up but had not seen him in quite some time. Wedding Crasher is HOT [like, walk into an Abercrombie they're putting him in the catalog HOT] but he was the guy who went to church camp solely for the girls, you know, the kind who would try to sneak away with someone during the campfire or the night game. Wedding Crasher is the guy who goes to weddings just to scope out the single girls.

I was dancing with the only other single and eligible girls at the wedding, and we all just rolled our eyes at Wedding Crasher before then accepting his request for a dance. I enjoyed a couple harmless dances with him before the time came for the exit of the bride and groom. And almost as if Wedding Crasher had been cued, at the time of the exit, he walked up to me…

Wedding Crasher: "So, you're single as fuck
Me: "Uh..." [cuz I suppose this is partially true]
Wedding Crasher: [slips hand around friend’s waist] "And you're looking pretty good tonight."
Me: "Ha..." [but this is unquestionably true]
Wedding Crasher: "And chances are you'll probably make out with somebody tonight.
Me: "Oh yeah?" [and by now I'm just curious...]
Wedding Crasher: "And that somebody will probably be me."

Wedding Crasher is not one for subtlety. And I like subtlety in a man...so instead of going to a random party to make out that night I found myself driving home, 2 hours in the opposite direction of that horny boy.

8.22.2008

Too bad I'm white

I just learned this last week that I weigh more cause I am white.























Thankfully, even though I am white, there is hope for me. All I had to do was fill out a couple questions (three EASY steps!) and then I qualified for....tea?





I am not kidding.
"But I drink tea all the time," you might say.
This is different, this is no ordinary tea...LOOK HOW IT WORKS!

















The fat in my body doesn't stand a CHANCE!

Could our world come up with anymore ridiculous diets? Please. Women need more things to obsess about and then "fail" at.

8.21.2008

Should a guy say I love you first?

So, our last poll was pretty split. Should a guy be the first one to say I love you? Do you think it freaks them out if the girl says it first? Maybe it is a sense of “power” – no one wants to be the first one to say it because they want to make sure that the other one is in it as much as they are. They don’t want to seem too needy or vulnerable.
But all of this seems to come from such a selfish view of love, one that is threatened by the relationship and looking for what they can TAKE from it rather than what they can give TO it.
I don’t think it should matter. I guess my last two options were essentially saying the same thing [although I think what I was getting at is it actually DOESN’T matter as opposed to it SHOULDN’T matter…get it? Anyway.] I think it comes out of the heart that is saying I love you. Why are you saying it? Is it expressing something deep within you? Is it for the sake of the other? Does it benefit the two of you? Then why hold back? I don’t think the guy has to be the first to say it. The girl is just as much a part of that relationship as the man is and HE has just as much of a need to feel loved, validated and needed as the woman does.
But I am interested to hear from the 33% of you that said the man should say it first. I think I voted that way on one of my computers [Cat’s out of the bag…I vote twice on my own polls. Is that pathetic?] Where does this viewpoint stem from? Why do you think it needs to be the man that says I love you first?

8.20.2008

Just let me do my job

Shall we share another funny hit-on story? This friend of mine doesn’t even need to be SEEN to get hit on…

----------------------------------
Mid-afternoon phone call:

Caller: Hi, I'd like to pay my matriculation fee over the phone.
Friend: OK, sure! Let me just pull up your file here...[pause]...oh yes...I believe we've actually spoken before!
Caller: Yes! Do you recognize my voice because you thought my voice was cute?
Friend: [???!!! nervous laughter ???!!!] Well, I actually don’t think in those terms anymore since I've gotten married...
Caller: Oh, well, since you are married, you can be more objective now!
Friend: [more nervous laughter] You know - I just don't think in those terms!
Caller: Oh well [he proceeds to tell me credit card number and then confirms that the matriculation fee is $100]
Friend: Actually, the matriculation fee is only $50 for your program.
Caller: Did I get a discount because my voice is cute?
Friend: hehehe - NO - the program fee is just $50 - for everyone.

---------------------------------
On second thought…maybe this boy just had low self-esteem, I am SURE you had a very cute voice weird man. :)

8.19.2008

Rejection

Let’s talk about rejection…

This is a fun topic that I am sure none of you have ever had to deal with. Still, I am going to take a moment to share with you the appropriate way to reject someone and then handle it:

To do this I will first share with you a semi-recent [bad example of a] conversation I had with a boy humbling myself to share my feelings with him. Now…this might not be word for word, I can’t remember EXACTLY what I said in this scarring conversation, I just remember it was brilliant.

Yeti: I want to like you, I mean I do like you, and I perceive your intentions and actions as leading me there. However, I remember when we first started talking you mentioned that you get in trouble for being the “nice guy” and I have had that little worry in the back of my mind. So, if I am reading you wrong I just need to know and you need to back off.

Boy: [deep inhale] I thought this was what you were going to talk to me about. [insert long awkward pause] I just don’t think this [insert hand gesture waving between the two of them] has anything to offer me.

Yeti: [speechless at this point – she HAS just learned that she has nothing to offer this man…she pretty much says nothing more and just lets the boy marinate in the awkward silence, fumbling to try and explain what he ACTUALLY MEANT for the rest of the walk home]

So the point of me sharing my pain[fully awkward story]: when a girl is vulnerable and tells you she likes you, don’t make her feel even smaller in the process. How SHOULD you respond?

Whether it is a lie or not [sometimes it's OK to lie], tell the girl that you are FLATTERED with what she has just shared with you, you are sorry if you gave her the wrong impression, and unfortunately you do not feel the same way – you enjoy her friendship immensely [OK, that word is optional, but it is nice] but are not interested in pursuing a relationship. We still need to hear the truth, but you don’t need to tell us we have nothing to offer.

And women, if a man has just told you the unfortunate yet gracious truth listed above, take it like a champ and move on. Don’t ask the dreaded “Why” question. That will only lead to uncomfortable “nothing to offer” or “use this cellulite cream” conversations. Don’t put the guy in that position. I don’t think THAT moment is when you want to learn about your bad breath. And PLEASE, never ever beg [cry, throw a fit, throw things at him, yell, stomp, hit, drive your car off a cliff...]. Ultimately, you don’t want to change yourself for him and convincing him to love you would not lead to a happily-ever-after. It might provide a temporary fix, but it would eventually all come crashing down.

And if all these roles are reversed (women rejecting men) do the same, men’s hearts are fragile too [but they also have bad breath].

8.18.2008

I can’t be trusted alone

It’s true when left to my own devices I am, quite frankly, a loser. The last date I had was a rotic [romantic without the man, get it? Not roMANtic, but rotic? I digress].

It was a Friday night and I had no plans so I decided to stay in. I had a steak in the fridge and thought it might be a good time to grill it up. I don’t have a grill so that part of the plan fell threw, but I decided to cook it up anyway. I threw together a creative [disgusting] concoction and threw it all in the oven.

While I waited for that to cook I popped open a bottle of wine (it was white) and threw in a romantic comedy, I believe the winner of the night was “You’ve Got Mail!”

I was enjoying my evening home alone. Delicious steak, bottle of wine, good movie…and even some chocolate chip cookies my roommate’s boyfriend had made and dropped off when they stopped in for a quick minute.

The fault of my evening came at TWO points.

Point ONE: I decided it would be a REALLY good idea to have a cigarette. I had only ever had one in my life and tonight seemed like a GREAT time to have my second one. We happened to have some in the house because of a party we had had the weekend before so I grabbed one and headed out to the patio. After a miserable 10 minutes of choking and coughing I came in satisfied [ah, yes, that is why I don’t smoke].

Point TWO: I actually finished the entire bottle of wine…BY MYSELF. That’s what you do on a date, right? Drink a nice bottle of wine? Only this bottle of wine was two-buck Chuck and I was on a date with myself.

Needless to say I crawled to bed not feeling so good. The mixture of ingredients I had put on my steak tasted weird, I drank a whole bottle of wine myself and the cigarette had just muddled them all together in a sickening way.

[2:00am Yeti's immediate roommate comes home from whatever evening activity she has been apart of. She silently enters room and begins quietly navigating around. Suddenly, Yeti's sits up in bed, moans slightly, and then vomits profusely all over the carpet next to her bed.]

Liz: Holy Crap!! Are you ok?

Now, I will confess, I do not remember much about the evening from this point on. I remember sitting in front of the toilet for a while to puke a couple more times while my ever so loving and gracious roommate cleaned up my vomit from the carpet. Apparently Liz and I had a whole conversation; she tells me I asked about her evening, told her some fun facts about Will Smith and then crawled myself back into bed.

And that, my friends, is what happens when I am left alone on a Friday night.
Please…someone find me a boyfriend.

8.14.2008

Good Thing I'm Smart

Three girls are standing in line to attend a taping of "So You Think You Can Dance"

One of them looks to her left and sees a billboard advertising the show "Big Bang Theory"

The board reads as follows: Smart is the new Sexy!

Friend: "Yeti, look, you're in luck!"

8.13.2008

Cheating

Sadly, we live in a world where cheating is a pretty common occurrence. Olivia posted a story that talked about this idea last week and it got me thinking. We want openness and honesty in a relationship, but could we really bring ourselves to trust and be in a relationship with someone that has cheated before?

As Olivia pointed out in her post, I don’t really understand the concept. Maybe I am misunderstanding it all, but I don't understand men or women who allow themselves to be 'the other.’ Why would you want to fool around with someone who is already in a relationship? Do you feel like they care about you more? Is there a thrill that is there for you? As Olivia put it, “for me, the fact the guy was willing to cheat would be a turn-off!”…AMEN!

So, what about you? Would you be willing to date someone you know has cheated in the past? Or would you be willing to start up a relationship with someone who has yet to break it off with their current boy/girlfriend?

Could you actually trust this person enough to be in a relationship – or would you always be watching your back, suspicious of everything and every relationship they have?
But on the other hand is there room for grace and forgiveness? And where do we draw the line…

8.12.2008

Lalalalalala

I had a friend once tell me to never stop singing because you never know when you’re going to run into a guy that just melts when a girl can sing. “For some guys that’s it – the stuff” he tells me.
The other day I was just singing my little heart out in my car as I waited for my friend outside her apartment complex. A guy walked by, stopped and watched me for a few seconds, nodded his head and gave me the “yeah, girl.” Then he did the smile wink and went about his way.
Hmm, maybe that friend’s advice was not so bad.
...And I think it works the other way around too.

8.11.2008

The doctors office

Want to know where a BAD place to meet people is? A doctor’s office. You’re coughing, probably with some contagious disease, I feel like crap – neither of us is putting out our best game. Let’s just hope fate brings us together at a Starbucks or bar some other time cause you ain’t gunna get much out of me right now.
And let’s face it, guys are really bad at reading signs and cues normally – but they are even worse at a doctor’s office. See this magazine I am holding up in front of my face? This means I want you to get away from me and stop talking to me. And when I am crunched over like this it means I don’t feel well. I don’t normally wear my sweats out in public, this is just the first time I have been out of the house all day and the thought of putting on jeans just seemed like more effort then I wanted to give.
Why do the waits at these offices have to be so long?

8.08.2008

Good news guys, you can use hair products























**This is what the print on the ad says:
"Real guys don’t want phony-looking hair. That’s why they use Consort.
Consort leaves hair clean. Natural. Yet in control. The price is right. And professionals have made it their No. 1 choice for years.
Consort Hairspray. It makes a real guy look real good."

8.07.2008

Who should pay on a date?

I almost made this post simply: “well, duh!” but then I guess, perhaps, I could write more…

The [not so] age-old question. I know what I want to answer to be, and perhaps that is why so many of us women voted that way? Wait, do only women read this blog? No, that can’t be – perhaps chivalry ISN’T dead.

Nevertheless, let’s talk about the obvious first problem we have here: the options in the poll. Let’s just say I got more then one frustrated email. Let me just say I'm sorry I did not provide you with adequate options and I admit this.

One such emailer suggested I should have had options like “whoever asked the other one out” or “depends on the arrangement” [which I don’t know if I really get that second one]. But I understand what he is getting at.

Perhaps it should not always fall on the man to pay – that’s a bit conservative and traditional of us to assume. But then maybe this whole topic falls in line with your thoughts on whether girls should ask out guys – should they then be initiating in paying and taking on more “traditional male roles” when it comes to the dating scene?

I think it should just be whoever makes more. Each of you should be required to bring a pay stub with you to compare once the bill comes; whoever made more that week/month will grab the bill.

8.06.2008

Two months pregnant and didn’t even know it

I got this new salsa shirt that I think is hot [am I allowed to say that about myself?]. The thing with salsa is…it doesn’t matter how good of a dancer you are, if you wear a boob shirt guys will ask you to dance like crazy. This shirt isn’t necessarily a boob shirt, but at least it is not a turtleneck.

As my roommate and I were walking through Old Town to Vive there were two men on the side of the street that asked us for money to get on a bus to Santa Monica. I can’t remember why, to see their girlfriends or something? Anyway, we told them we did not have any, sorry, and proceeded to wait for the crosswalk to change so we could cross the street.

Man #1: Are you pregnant?
Yeti: Excuse me?
Man #2: Dude, you ain’t supposed to ask that.
Man #2 But look at her, I think she’s pregnant. You are, ain’t you?
Yeti: [doesn’t really say anything, just fumbles with her words…uhh….um….]
Erika: Yes, she is two months.
Yeti sends Erika a look of shock and confusion
Man #1: See, I told ya. Well congratulations!
Yeti: Thank you?

The crosswalk changes so we can walk across the street. As we walk Erika turns to me and says, “I just figured they wouldn’t hit on or mess with a pregnant woman so it was the best way to get them to leave us alone.”

Ah well, taking one for the team I suppose. And I still haven’t decided if I am going to wear that shirt again…

8.05.2008

My Facebook Status

There is something interesting about what happens when you update a facebook status. I can say something like "Yeti is salsa dancing” and no one says anything, but when just a couple weeks ago I came out with "Yeti is having a hard time believing in love” everyone felt like they needed to chime in.

Now, I will be the first to admit that I hate it when people put their ish up on facebook. The whole world does not need to hear the crap going on in your life in a status update – but this was different [trust me]. I can, however, understand how people so easily misinterpreted what I was saying.

Here are a couple responses I got:
“Hang in there sweetie”
“You also, huh?”
“You must believe in love!”
“I’m with you on that one”
“Hang in there.”
“Woah, that is an intense status message. Not sure what’s going on but I sure hope things are ok!”
“He’s out there somewhere, just be patient.”
“Be patient – all in good time. When it’s right, it’s right.”
“Although being patient stinks…it really is worth waiting for the guy that will make the whole wait worth it.”
“Hard time believing in it? Well...it sounds like at least you know it exists!! When in doubt...I always just say ‘God, you're runnin the show, not me.’ You know whatever he has going on for you- is for a reason!!”
“Love exists because GOD IS LOVE!”

I also got several private messages encouraging me.

Let me be honest, my discouragement was not about me “oh poor me, I’m single,” it was more about the way I ache with those around me. I have lots of friends that are struggling right now: being cheated on, feeling trapped, walked out on by a spouse, dishonesty, etc.

It is just difficult for me to believe in love when more and more everyday I think what my parents have is one in a trillion.

BUT mainly the point of this is be careful when choosing a facebook status message…cause people will just start assuming things and then advising you accordingly.

8.04.2008

Happy 31st Anniversary Mom and Dad

















You inspire me. I am so thankful for parents like you that have provided me with such a wonderful example of true and unconditional love. It hasn’t been easy (probably cause of us kids ☺) but you two have worked hard, committed to one another, and made a choice to love one another no matter what. I pray that one day I can be half as happy as you and one day and find someone I can enter into a committed faithful relationship with.

8.01.2008

Siennaaaaaa


















Now here is an interesting commercial, have you seen it yet? My friend Olivia pointed it out to me. I actually hate car commercials - I think they are a waste of air time on the airwaves, but this one is kind of funny.

It is for the new Toyota Sienna 2008. The woman says "say it again" and the man whispers "five-star safety rating" and the women lets out a little moan like she's having an orgasm. I read somewhere it is supposed to be a little play on the Calvin Kline Obsession commercials.

Now, I've never been turned on by a car, let alone a mini-van, but maybe that's just cause I've never tried the Toyota Sienna...

I could not download the actual video so I have to send you to an exterior link: you can watch it here. Or by clicking on the picture