eHarmony you woo me

Once being on eHarmony they never leave you alone. They frequently sends me mail asking me to rejoin their lovely site - promising me that I will find love THIS TIME. In the last letter they sent me, they almost got me. It said:
“At eHarmony, we’ve brought together thousands of singles based on their compatibility profiles. And, according to Harris Interactive research, in the U.S. alone, on average, 236 eHarmony members marry every day! We know if you give us another chance, you’ll find a more satisfying experience this time.”

WHAT? Are you kidding me? I don't believe that number. Are they marrying people they connected on eHarmony? And if so how many of these are because they got drunk on their first date and then they just got the marriage annulled? Can we look at some divorce rates here?

"And let's be honest, who gets married on a Tuesday." – my roommate

OK…so it is just an average, either way, that statistic is RIDICULOUS.


Rebecca said...

I bet its cheaper to get married on a Tuesday, lots cheaper.

Saturday Morning Mystic said...

My cousin Bubba (not lying, that is his real name) was married on a Tuesday, because that is when the J.P. performed weddings.

[F]oxymoron said...

Why pay monthly fees when you can head to the local pub or trendy hipster joint and score a few bad dates?

... that being said...

I do know a couple that found each other via eHarmony and have been happily married for five years.

Saturday Morning Mystic said...

Okay, so I am a little OCD Yeti. I admit it. But, I decided to do the math. Let's assume that you can roughly divide that 236 marriages in half (because they wouldn't promote marriages they didn't set up right? So, that is 118 marriages a day, which is roughly 43,070 marriages a year, and 43178 on a lead year. eHarmony began in 2000, which was a leap year. That makes 7 regular years and three leap years the company has been running, which should be, by my calculations 431,054 marriages or 862,108 people getting married. How can roughly a million of these people be running around and I don't know them? Thus, I think the stat is puffed up, because I guaran-dog-tee ya, they are counting people who got married independently of eHarmony, but were once members. Okay, OCD-out!

[F]oxymoron said...

@ Saturday Morning Mystic... OCD or not, you kick ass!

B-W said...

Not ever having done eHarmony, I can't compare, but I'm pretty annoyed at Classmates.com for their "hound you till you come back" tactics, too.

eHarmony_jack said...

First of all, I want to say that I regret that you didn't have an successful eHarmony experience. However, I want to assure you that the marriage statistic we shared with you is true and was verified, not by eHarmony, but by Harris Interactive, an Independent Research firm. Without knowing the particulars of your previous eHarmony experience, I do want to share that finding the love of your life on eHarmony is a process that takes time. On average, these successful members were matched with their spouse after dedicating 3 to 6 months to their search, and many of them also experienced the inevitable ups and downs associated with such a search: http://tr.im/gpbn. Lastly, our member's success is our success, and as America's #1 Relationship site, Customer Care agents are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week to help all our members have a successful eHarmony experience.

Anonymous said...

If I have calculated this correctly,that means that 86,140 people get married a year that are part of eHarmony. The statistics do not state that the people get married b/c of eHarmony...just that they are members and now married. On top of that, with a membership of around 5,ooo,ooo people, that means 17% of eHarmony members are married...whether eHarmony was involved or not. So you mean to tell me that it is something phenomenal that 17% of single people are getting married? Nothing against eHarmony, I know someone who met someone unbelievable through it. My response comes b/c of the use of these statistics to lure someone back into paying membership status, and they don't seem to reflect anything that amazing.

Danielle Graham said...

Dear E-Harmony-Jack,

I'm not sure if I am more annoyed by the way in which E-harmony markets/defends itself or that your username sounds like profanity.

Either way, you missed the heart of the blog post which was that:
a. Your statistics are crap
b. Your marketing techniques border stalking, which your creepy, sales pitch blog comment clearly confirms.

All in the name of helping us all find love?? Yyyyyyyyyyeah right.

charissa said...

omg who is eharmony_jack THAT IS AWESOME HAHAHHA

JD said...

Your roommate is funny.

Julie said...

I wonder if Eharmony is promoted within the polygamist circles???

Just a thought.

eHarmony_jack said...

Hi Anonymous and Danielle,

My name actually is Jack and I work for eHarmony.  Not trying to stalk, here – just address concerns about eHarmony with factual information.  Our company was founded by Dr. Neil Clark Warren who was saddened by the number of marriages he saw in his 35 years of marital counseling that broke up because of incompatibilies.  He had a vision to do what he could to decrease the divorce rate.  With that foundation, it is our mission to help as many people as we can find happy long-lasting relationships through using our service and educate them about making healthy choices in relationship partners.

I’m not sure where you’re getting all of your numbers, Anonymous, but here’s a link to our Press Release with the statistics:


The sited statistics represent only those members who married “as a result of using the service”.  We have confidence in our service and love to see people find their soul mates.  No other online dating site can make these claims. 

insomniaclolita said...

LOL whats up with people these days? since when getting married in any day of the week beside weekend could be good?

Yeti said...

eHarmony_jack...thank you for your kind words and the helpful links (don't think you're a stalker). i have no problem with eHarmony - i did it twice. i just think it works better for people who are actually at that serious part of life where they are ready for marriage - i, unfortunately, was a bit more at the dating stage of the game so i think that's why it went flop on me.

thos estatistics still seem a bit out of control - but i am glad to hear they are real. i would like to hear some of the divorce rates, though. do eHarmony marriages have a better chance/record of lasting? or in the end is it the same as if you met someone in a pub?

~sarah said...

the thing i didn't like about eHarmony was that when i decided i didn't want to pay for membership right away and turned my profile "off," they kept turning it back on and allowing guys to "request communication." i can only assume to lure me into paying so i could "meet" those guys. but i couldn't respond to the guys at all because i wasn't a paying member, and didn't want to be matched with anyone at that time anyway. i felt really bad for those guys who would assume that since i didn't respond, i wasn't interested or found some reason not to like them. that isn't really being thoughtful or kind to your customers. eventually i just had to delete the profile because no matter how many times i turned it off, they turned it back on. and that's why, when i decided to pay for a dating site, i didn't choose eHarmony.

Danielle Graham said...

Dear E-Harmony Jack,

With all due respect, You are not trying to "address concerns." You are marketing a business that thrives off of a basic human need to find love and lasting companionship in a world where people are starved for it.

Unless of course you are gay, depressed, or unable to pay $50 bucks a month...then... NO LOVE FOR YOU.

One simple google search of "eharmony horror stories" speaks to the inefficacy of a "scientific" method of match making, much more than your odd posts here do.

Nothing against you personally E-harmony Jack. Just your marketing strategies.



Danielle Graham said...

Dear E-H J.

One more thing...

Harris Interactive is a Marketing Research company. They are not conducting independent research. E-Harmony hires them to accomplish the following "results":

"Our award-winning expertise in developing persuasive communications and advertising ensures that this positioning will come to life, helping you build value through a strengthened corporate image, more sales, or support for your cause."


Saturday Morning Mystic said...

C'mon Danielle. That is amazing! And I don't feel slimed either, like I do with E-H-J. I now feel that E-Harmony is pretty desperate, and am glad to have not encountered them before. I never had that impression until Jack's defense began. Kind of odd, huh? I think I will learn to appreciate my singleness a little more.

Danielle Graham said...

Saturday Morning Mystic...my thoughts exactly!

B-W said...

I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure I remember reading something about eHarmony launching a service for gay couples (having been criticized much as Danielle's post a few posts ago did) not that long ago.

And, no, I'm not talking about one of eHarmony's many competitors. It was my understanding that this was to be a service launched BY eHarmony....

Danielle Graham said...

Oh, I just can't stop myself....

Mr. Jack, according to stats I found on the website you provided, Harris Interactive conducted a study by polling a little under 7200 E-Harmony users, that I am assuming E-Harmony provided.

I heard you have 5 million users now. But lets say you only have 3 million (I'm feeling generous). That means your "independent" researchers gathered data from a measly .2 something percent of your users!!! My sources tell me that any legitimate research would test 3 to 5% of a population before drawing the types of conclusions you all have drawn.

So I stick with my original assertion...

Your stats are crap.

And further, you're original posts bug me more than ever now.

Yeti said...

Good point, Danielle.

Plus, they say that lowering the divorce rate is the goal of the organization, but in fact increased marriages is the claim of these statistics. Without any information on divorce rates there is no measurement taken for the success or their program. And if they do pole married couples for a divorce rate, they better ask more than one quarter of one percent. Otherwise, it's a joke.

Danielle Graham said...

BW, You are correct. They are "coming out" with an eHarmony for gays-supposedly this March called "Compatible Partners!" Who knew??

It was prompted by a lawsuit and many complaints by gay people though-(which is ridiculous imo-in addition to being pro gay rights, I am also pro free association for businesses.)

Anyhoo...I wonder if they'll create an eHarmony for the depressed (they currently reject people who show signs of depression)or for poor people.

They could partner with big pharma and create e-getHAPPILYmarried. Get free Prozac with every match.


They could get some of that bailout money and create eSubsidy for those of us who fall on hard times more than we fall in love.

The possibilities are endless.

Anonymous said...

All I know is that eHarmony worked too well for me! I got four wives in three states and all the harmony I got is killing my golf game.

Is there a site to pawn off some of these women? eHarmony? How do I give some of these women back?

jb said...

Hi I'm JB and I'm Gay lolol I feel like i'm joining a gay club.

I wanted to join E-Harmony when my Ex dumped my ass, for my best friend, who just happens to be a guy...yeah that's right....lololol I'm one of those women, please feel free to stop by my blog and you'll see what I mean.

Anyhow, I couldn't join... why b/c the gays aren't allowed, yeah the gays, you know the other race of people who aren't so straight or morons....well my ex is the exception to the E-H rule maybe she can join now or till she decides to go back..mmmmm

DG is right ,about all she is saying and e-jack right as if that dosen't sound freaky and creepy all around. E-H gay or staright who cares i would rather go to the local pub for a good or bad date. Hey even at the local bar for some bad sex...hold the E.

And DG this is the best answer you gave E-Jack...he could have used another name to use but i guess he's into himself more then he wants to admit.

Either way, you missed the heart of the blog post which was that:
a. Your statistics are crap
b. Your marketing techniques border stalking, which your creepy, sales pitch blog comment clearly confirms.

All in the name of helping us all find love?? Yyyyyyyyyyeah right.

Please feel free to drop by and E-jack please never drop by there's not enough E on my blog. And I show signs of slight depression and we know good couples are happy not sad or poor right. E-H so blind to the real world. I think i will go E pray to E Jesus for some E so i can love myself more.


jb said...

Yeti...sorry I also wanted to tell you I love your blog and Danielle Graham rocks....i'm going over to say my hello's.

Take Care