2. When you see someone walking by themselves, leave them alone!3. If you pull over to help someone with car problems, remember not to assault them!
4. NEVER open an unlocked door or window uninvited.
5. If you are in an elevator and someone else gets in, DON’T ASSAULT THEM!
6. Remember, people go to laundry to do their laundry, do not attempt to molest someone who is alone in a laundry room.
7. USE THE BUDDY SYSTEM! If you are not able to stop yourself from assaulting people, ask a friend to stay with you while you are in public.
8. Always be honest with people! Don’t pretend to be a caring friend in order to gain the trust of someone you want to assault. Consider telling them you plan to assault them. If you don’t communicate your intentions, the other person may take that as a sign that you do not plan to rape them.9. Don’t forget: you can’t have sex with someone unless they are awake!
10. Carry a whistle! If you are worried you might assault someone "on accident" you can hand it to the person you are with, so they can blow it if you do.And, ALWAYS REMEMBER: if you didn’t ask permission and then respect the answer the first time, you are committing a crime- no matter how "into it" others appear to be.
BECAUSE THEY CAN FREAKING TAKE THEIR SHIRTS OFF WHENEVER THEY WANT.
man it is hot outside. and that is just unfair.
But my point...
In honor of all the buzz around these books - and the new Hollywood version that is going to begin filming again, I thought I would re-post the story about our very own girl with the dragon tattoo. You might remember her from the Fall of 2008 - she got a lot of good reactions out of you readers. And those of you who jumped onto this blog after that time - we wouldn't want you to miss out!
THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO
she puts into words the very rhythms of my heart. if you love poetry at all, please buy her poetry book "The Secrets of Falling" - I've read it about 6789876543234567890 times - and it changes me a bit more every time.
The Tyranny of the Mirror
Sometimes I forget how to lie
how to steely stare down
my mirror eye
and convince my reflection
she is good enough,
she is smart enough,
and goddammit, people
Some days I forget that what I see
That what is housed invisibly within,
floating somewhere between bones and skin,
is more everlasting than its cage.
thick around the middle
I think about my body
of unsatisfactory parts.
with no joy
the increasing distance
spaced on either side
of my waist.
I remember when
were just delicious
and bore no correlation
grande y bonita
For weeks now, the Mexican man
behind the counter at the Shell station
has been flirting.
He woos me with free fountain sodas
and appreciative stares.
Finally today he asks if I have a boyfriend
and shakes his head in dismay
when I reply.
“When I come to America, I dream
of meeting girl like you,”
he says, looking up to meet my eyes.
“Strong. Big. Beautiful.”
I blush and pay for my Diet Coke
and all the way home, wonder if “big”
can be construed to mean “tall.”
The “Diet for Dummies”
costs $40 to download
and I pay the price
print out the menu
that reads “broiled halibut”
and “carrot sticks,”
dream of slimming body image
solutions while couching
in sweat pants, munching
white cheddar Cheez-Its.
Just because you wear new skin
than you did 2,556 days ago
does not mean the old you
has been forgotten.
Cell memory gets passed down
from regeneration to regeneration.
The new cells are born with collective
knowledge and an inferiority complex.
What you focus on the most is remembered,
is held within muscles,
whispered from vein to vein.
Even the smallest of cells knows
exactly how much you hate yourself.
seven years of bad luck
Somehow the tyranny of the mirror
remains through the ages unbroken,
undiminished by intelligence
and the compliments of lovers.
Seven years ago I thought I was fat,
posing for pictures with a cheek-pinching
smile, stomach sucked
concave. Now I see
what that girl never could,
that she was traffic-stopping,
But standing sideways before the glass,
I think that seven years is a long time –
things grow. sag. wrinkle.
To find this woman beautiful,
I will need seven more.
-Lo, whose bikini days are behind her.