The secret behind doing well in a triathalon

This story was submitted to me by a reader....enjoy!


So, when I was in my younger 20's I told myself I was going to do a triathlon. It never happened, so I added to my resolution the phrase "by the time I am 30." As I was nearing in on my 30th birthday reality set in, that it was now time. I commenced training and signed up for my triathlon.

I awoke early in the morning, road my bike to the triathlon and searched for my area in the "Clydesdale" section of the transition area. (This is where you store your bike, and swimming equipment.) I was waiting around nervously, and began to talk to other competitors. Out of nowhere, one of the men next to me said, "take a look at that!" For the first time that morning, I realized that our transition row was next to the 25-29 year old women.

The gentleman proceeded to tell me that he was a 6'2", 260-pound biking machine. We were starting on his weakest area, which was the run. He let me know that his strategy was to follow, "that piece of ass" he just showed me. I asked what if that slowed him down instead of helped him finish with a better time. A new guy chimed in, "a good piece of ass makes it worth it."
He said he loved being in the transition area because then he knew the exact age of the women he was "trolling." Classy.

As we step up to the starting line, I find our hero lined up behind his new stalkee, and didn't see him again until after the race was done. Presumably he finished a few seconds behind our victim. Now you know the secret lives of the "Clydesdale" division.


James said...

You gotta love those Clydesdale trolls. A good piece of "ass" shouldn't be too hard to find at a triathlon.

The Accidental Vegetarian said...

So, I was just minding my own business, and checking my Facebook, when low and behold, my trolly friend was not alone. One of my friends texted this: Going for a run around the Rose Bowl. The speed at which I run will depend upon the speed of any hotties that might be running in front of me.