My beloved Lizzo and I were having our bi-weekly coffee date at Peets. We had found a perfect table outside, had our beverages of choice as well as our Noah’s Bagles. Could Saturday mornings BE any better?
Right as we were in the middle of our discussion about prostitutes and gay men a woman approached our table…
Woman: Excuse me, will you be here for a little bit?
Us: Sure, yeah.
Woman: Great, that’s my son right there [pointing to the left of her] would you mind watching him while I just run inside real quick.
Us: Sure, no problem!
It wasn’t until after she walked away that we realized how STRAGE this was. At first we thought nothing of it because we come from a community that has all sorts of children that we watch and play with on a regular basis. But this woman knows NOTHING about us – and our conversation before she approached us wasn’t even anything that would instill confidence in her about our character.
I began looking around the table and at our clothes for what gave us away: “WE ARE TOTALLY SANE AND TRUSTWORTHY WOMEN – TRUST US WITH YOUR CHILDREN!” I couldn’t find anything.
What felt like 45 minutes later (actual time = 4 minutes) I turned to Liz and said “hypothetical question, what if the mom never comes back?” I mean, we’ve heard of these things happening before. And what kind of person just trusts two random strangers?
Not 1 minute later the little boy began to have a melt down. As he began screaming and crawling toward the automatic doors of the “Fresh and Easy” we decided we needed to do something.
Liz went inside to get the mother and I went to take care of the kid.
As I went toward the kid I realized the mother had never told me his name. So as he continued to scram as I got closer and closer – I took notice of the crowd of people now watching me as I walked closer to this boy as I said “Hey buddy, we’ll go find your mommy, I promise, just come with me!” How creepy is that?? The only thing I could have said to make it creepier would have been “want some candy!!”
As he crawled closer to the door (screaming) I decided I had to pick him up [the door was going to smash him, people]. This was doubly awkward since most people thought I was kidnapping him. Luckily right as I had picked him up his mother came walking up toward us.
The worst part of it all is that when Liz went to go tell her that her son was having a melt down all she said was “Oh geez, I KNEW this would happen, sorry!” What? If you knew your kid would get super scared when he couldn’t find you WHY would you leave him with strangers that don’t even know his name?
My point: next time I am just going to ask her for her credit card…