Pick-up Lines

We all love a good pick-up line. I will admit, meeting people is difficult. Especially when you just see them in a fleeting moment on the street or across a crowded bar. But sometimes...it is better to just keep your mouth shut. Let them adore your pretty face and wonder at the mystery you might have been.
Here in LA I get better pick-up lines then anywhere else I have ever been in my life. Amazing. And by that I mean I don't know who taught these boys that this would be the best way to pick up a girl...but they need to not take advice from these people ever again. Throughout the next few blogs I would love to share with you some of my favorite pick-ups
**None of these actually worked, so if you are a guy - please do not take notes unless it is what NOT to do**

Ralph's Man--
Yeti is walking out of Ralph's – her neighborhood grocery store. She is approached by a black man with a clipboard trying to get signatures on his petition to allow the NFL to play at the Rose Bowl.

Man: "You wanna sign my petition to get the NFL here in Pasadena?"
Yeti: "Sure, I love football!"
[Yeti begins to sign the petition]
Man: "How you doing?”
Yeti: “Fine.”
Man: “How ‘bout you and me make it interracial”
Yeti: “Excuse me?”
Man: “Come on, I dare ya.”
Yeti: “Um…ok…I’ll think about it” [said as walking toward car]
Man: “Makes you nervous doesn’t it? Come on, I’ll treat ya real nice.”
Yeti: “Ok, bye bye.” [nervous laughter]

Hellooooo Dreamboat

Hi, my name is "Yeti", and I am searching for the Yeti [not myself, you know, the other one]. I have had some interesting interactions with boys since moving here to LA. Some of my girlfriends tell me my stories are interesting - even funny. So, I decided perhaps others would enjoy hearing some of my stories and experiences. Who doesn't enjoy someone else's pain? We'll start small.

I will admit it - I have tired the online dating thing. I am not a fan. Let's meet a couple of the guys who were supposedly matches for me:

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"I am looking for a princess; the woman of my dreams; a woman who will love me, a woman who will be my best friend. I am looking for a woman who will hold me after a long day at work; someone who will hug me and kiss me for no reason; someone I can trust with my secrets; someone who believes in happy endings; someone who will challenge me to be more like Jesus; someone who is family orientated. I am looking for a woman who I can laugh with, cry with, and expierence life with as we grow together. I am looking for a princess who wants to be swept off her feet and carried away into the sunset to live happily ever after!
I am a very very hopeless romantic. All I know is that I've been carrying around this little glass slipper for oh so long, desperately searching for the princess to whom it belongs! :-)"
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Oh, wow...if you are not vomiting in your mouth right now there is something wrong with you.

Or how about this winner that sent me this after hearing from me that I want to move to Nepal for a couple of years and work with the rehabilitation of the sexually exploited. I asked him these three questions and these were his answers...
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Describe your typical day.: Monday through Friday I get up, take a shower, go to work for 9-10 hours, come home, go to the gym, eat dinner, watch a movie, go to sleep. On the weekends, my band plays every Friday night in Fullerton, Saturday's I workout at the gym and watch another movie or two, hang with friends. Sunday I workout again, write some music or play guitar, work on my singing voice, watch a movie then hit the hay...any questions?

Describe your view on travel? Where are some of your favorite places you have been.: I love it, although i'm too poor to do it right now. Ever since i've been in Cali(Feb '06-present) I went to San Diego, San Francisco, all over LA county and Orange County. San Fran's Little Italy is my favorite. I saw two football games there last season. I went to Cancun in '05 for Spring Break. That was fun but my party days are over. I also went to Munich, Germany with my bro in August of '04. That was fun drinking huge beersteins at the biergartens. I want to go to Italy and maybe north to Seattle and Portland. Europe's my #1 destination.

If you could accomplish only one thing during the rest of your life, what would it be?: I want to be a famous musician, model or actor. Mainly the first one. I play 7 instruments. That's why I came to Cali. I'm also working the hell out of my body so that I can possibly be a male model. Acting auditions is another path i'd like to follow.

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Yep...with matches like that - I have NO idea why I am still single.

...more to come!